Relapse Basics

Now there are many aspects to the conditions and causes of relapse, however in this post we are only going to deal with the basics. Relapse does not just happen out of the blue, it happens in stages, the final stage is that physical act of picking up. Relapse starts where our disease is centered, in the mind. An experience and/or a situation will trigger a feeling, and it is this feeling that has been triggered is where the relapse is born. The key here is to recognize what is going on and to take appropriate action. Now if you are in the early years of this recovery, this trigger and feeling could be related to a reservation you’ve been holding unto , or the possibility that you have never have embraced the aspect of total abstinence. If this is not the case, then like most who experience relapse, a situation or experience has triggered on some level a feeling of low self-esteem, self-concept, around some unresolved issue, or again some unresolved issue concerning shame and/or guilt. Now as these feelings become more prevalent, there are some basic tell-tale signs that you are in relapse mode. They are very basic and usually follow this usual progression. First off you start becoming less forthcoming with your sponsor and/or your support system about how you are feeling and what you’re thinking combined with not disclosing what is going on with you. (Dishonesty through omission). This may or may not be combined with the beginning of lessening meetings and or being late for meeting and/or leaving early. This then turns to little lies or untruths to your sponsor and support system. which gradually grows to outright lies and less true communication. This will grow into spending less time with sponsor and support system. You start going by or to dangerous places and/or people to your recovery. A growing irritability towards your sponsor, support system and meetings. This Combined with growing isolation and recovery practices, along with becoming argumentative. The key here is becoming aware of these signs, and then taking the actions to turning this behaviour around. The action that needs to be taken is the exact opposite of these actions; you need to become more forthright with your sponsor and support system. Explaining what exactly you are feeling and going through, spending more time with sponsor and support system. Making sure that you are attending your usual meetings in full and possibly more. Getting back to the recovery practices which got you to this point, reading recovery material, journaling, prayer and meditation, whatever you had been doing. Another key aspect that you need to be aware of, that this in no way means that you haven’t been working a program, or that your program is not right, or anything negative at all about you or your recovery. This is a normal aspect of recovery, we all experience negativity and/or uncomfortable feelings which trigger us, you must remember two things, the first is that your disease centers in your mind and has a contract on your butt, Two that this is more than likely a good thing, it means you are growing and “more is being revealed”, it just means there is more work needed. This is why many repeat the process of doing the steps repeatedly during their recovery. Remember the work never really stops. We just continue to grow and become healthier with even greater freedom and possibilities for happiness.

Remember God does not create garbage