Just For Today/ One Day at a Time

This saying can be confusing and sometimes irrateting (to say the least) to newcomers. Yes in some instances time really does matter and in making some decisions one must really explore the past histories and future possibilities. However in recovery when we are quoting the phrase, it ussually an attempt to soothe a person in turmoil, distress and/or just basically overwhelmed by one or more situations. The basic aspect this is used to relieve is the habit that most addictive personalties have in dealing with problems , we get all caught up in our heads and try to remedy "percieved catastrophies" right now and usually involving mutltiple outcomes, scenarios and fixes. With the perception that this is a catastrophy and monumental and that nobody can understand, and I need an imediate solution, or my world will fall apart. As well as of course the aspect of getting Clean and Sober can only be done one day at a time and sometimes in the begining for some of us we have to break that down to just for this moment I won't use, and then just for this hour I won't drink, and so on.

When sh*t happens and it will because that is just life. It's not like you come into recovery and get clean and sober and your life just turns into fantasy land and the world just gives you everything and all problems are eliminated. Not Even close Everybody in recovery has Life problems and unexpected situations, possibly even more than "normys". Yes miraculous things will happen and fantastic oppotunities will present themselves, however so will everyday life and that is all it is is life on lifes terms. However in recovery you will learn how to put these catastrophies into perspective, how to see the big picture, you will know that it is not the "end of the world" or even earth shattering it is but life, and it will be ok.

No matter what the situation, a mate leaves us, a mate cheats on us, a loved one dies, lose a job, an accident, getting audited, getting charge,incarcerated, whatever the situation. We learn to stop mostly the racing in the mind, we Breathe in and out, we reach out ( sponsor, peer group, support group, God) pray, Then look at the big picture right at this moment, am I alive, do I have food in my stomach, do I have a roof over my head (even just temporary). Then right at this moment things are OK, Not fantastic but ok. next examine what issue is, Have I done everything I am capable of doing at this moment, calmy do what you can right at this moment and leave the rest to when it is possible no use dwelling on things that can not be done. Now Just do what is Right and what is right in front of you, if you do just that you will be amazed at how many things will take care of themselves.

As for situations as stated above, it's not to belittle them or to ignore how painful some of these life events can be, however that's all they are is life events normal everyday life occurences> Sometimes what we perceive as painful unjust curses, end up being just the opposite and are actual blessings. Lets look at a death, painful and tragic and this is amplified depending on how close we were to the individual and the circumstances, however it is a fact of life we are born and we will die, in this world we live in there are many possibilities how this will come about, yet it will happen, and depending on your beliefs what becomes of the departed,? they got to heaven, reincarnation, vahalla, ETC, we just don't want them gone they our supposed to stay here with us, what if they have been suffering, isn't the option of not in this world are they better off in a better place, yet selfishly we weren't ready to let them go. Not that we do not need to grieve, to feel the loss and the separation is painful sometimes even more depending on the circumstances, yet can you change it? Can you bring them back to life? Can you go back in time and prevent it? Reality is they are gone . Sad but reality, Painful but reality. Wrongfully, possibly but realty. Reality is reality and we have to adjust ourselves to reality because it will not adjust itself to us. If we want to be happy, joyous and free and we want those around us to have this too then we have no alternative but to accept reality for what it is, you don't have to like it but you need to accept it, even if you believe it to be wrong or unjust. If this is the case then all the more reason to accept it because it is the way to move on and in moving on we can do more about recovery and in recovery we recreate ourselves and the world in which we live making for a better reality for all is the ultimate goal only it starts with ourselves. As for mates leaving losing jobs etc. How many times have you heard some one or yourself saying "I just got the best job I ever had, they have this and that" or "I just met the best mate in the world they're understanding loving caring Yaddda Yadda" Well would that have happened if they were still at the old job, or with the Ex. Probably not. It's like the old saying, When one door closes another opens, We just have to be open to see and looking for it it might only be a crack open or a window. However if your dwelling in the past and fighting reality you will probably miss fantastic opportunities TODAY.
Remember God does not make Garbage