Tradition 5

Tradition 5-- The primary purpose is to carry the message to those still suffering. Now basically each 12 step affiliation states tradition 5 according to their own area of recovery. However the basic is that stated above—to carry the message—to those who are still suffering, whether it is the alcoholic, addict, ETC... This is the primary purpose. I believe that many, after a few days forget this tradition and its simplicity, many start to add little stipulations to this if you want their help.
I bring this up because the other day I happened to visit an area where I spent almost 13 years of my 18 years of sobriety. While we their visiting, we went to a meeting, (actually one I was involved in starting). This meeting happened to be a cake meeting for a person with 7 years (congratulations). I was very saddened and disappointed in what I heard and saw at this meeting. Let me share with you what bothered me at this meeting. At this meeting there was one newcomer and another coming back. This in itself was beautiful. So the readings were read, and this meeting has the seventh tradition in the beginning, so as not to disrupt the flow of the meeting. So after all this was done people were asked to share. Of the twenty or so that shared, it seemed that only a few knew the person having the cake. Those who did addressed this person and shared a little on the reading. The newcomer spoke of his friend, whom was with him had suggested they go as the newcomer had now been clean and sober 5 days (wonderful). Of all those that spoke only one gentleman addressed the newcomer and welcomed him, this person also welcomed back the person coming back. The only other person to address the newcomer was another gentleman with a few months; he shared how he was learning how to stay and that today he congratulated the person taking a cake however his basic concern was hoping he could make it to seven months never mind seven years. After the serenity prayer, at the end of the meeting. A few of my old friends came up to talk with me, as I was sharing with them I noticed the newcomer leaving through the side door, Alone. An old habit I can still remember, so I politely excused myself as quickly as I could. I went outside to see if I could find the newcomer, however he was already gone. As I came back in I looked around for the other gentlemen who had spoken of hoping to make 7 months, as well as the lady coming back, I also looked for a guy who spoke of struggling for a few years now. To my dismay though there was still a fair amount of people still there. The ones I mentioned were all gone.
So this is why I felt so saddened and disappointed upon leaving this meeting. I felt that my beloved fellowship had failed these people, How often I have seen we get a little clean and sober, find our cliques, and we forget what it was like coming in feeling alone, lonely nowhere to go no one to understand and help , feeling the outsider. I remember the distrust and scepticism I had when someone reached out. I also remember the relieve, the covered and scared joy of being accepted, the feeling of being part of, no matter how long I fought it , or how long I kept it suppressed or allowed myself to even consider it possible. The outstretched hand was inwardly deeply appreciated, no matter how long I actually allowed it to show. And basically is that not what it is all about , Helping the newcomer feel comfortable and welcome, so that they will come back and here the message that they no longer need to suffer, that there is a way out and most of all is that someone cares. That is what the Fifth Tradition means to me.
Remember God does not create garbage